The sweeter things in life
I believe in the roman god. I believe everything has two sides, and nothing is just black or white. I believe in the grey. What is your aspiration in life?
My aspiration in life. I think my aspiration is too complicated for anyone to ever truly understand. I think people think their dreams and aspirations are what makes them stand out, what makes them unique or remarkable. Really what makes a person special is how they find a way to actually reach their goal, to fulfill their dreams. I think that journey of a life is what makes humans so exceptional.
Everyone thinks they are The One. They are the lead singer, the lead actor. No one ever puts themselves in the supporting role. Why is that?
I suppose people are just too selfish to think badly about themselves. I think that the narcissism of people is what helps them get through life, what helps them survive. I think I have grown to not think too highly of myself. The higher you climb, the harder you fall.
I hope you readers will like these little segments of my mind un-wrapping itself at the end of the day.
With love, me
Finding difficulty in simplicity
I can’t date boys my own age. I date men. Dating- for one night. I find it unsuitable to date anyone my own age. I can however date older men, why?
I don’t find boys intriguing. They seem immature. Men seem alluring, exciting, dangerous. I like it that way, I don’t like boring. It’s sad to waste life on tedious relationships or friends.
Men like me. They are drawn to me and I can’t help it, I’m drawn to them. It’s magnetic, electric when I’m with an older guy. Sometimes I get money for having sex with them. Intercourse- beautifully, sexually pleasurable.
My psychiatrist says I am too old for my age, too mature. And that being too mature can be difficult, I can’t communicate the way I should at my age. The psychiatrist was a man, I stopped seeing him a year ago, it got inappropriate.
Sometimes I get scared to meet the men who want me. For money. I get scared that someone will find out and that the guys will get punished not me. I don’t want anyone to get hurt but I want me to…feel pain in pleasure. I guess it’s a deadly sin.
I rarely feel bad about it. But when I do, I feel dirty. I take showers twice a day. I feel ugly and bad, not in a good way either.
I hope someone likes to read, because I love to write. Au revoir.
“We are all beautifully ugly.”